So, yesterday I’m at the supermarket, right. And I go to the check-out counter, and I present the cashier with a frozen pizza, 2 litres of diet coke, a Men’s Health magazine, an FHM, and a big box of tissues. And she says to me, “You must be single, right?”

So I day, “Umm, yeah. How did you know?”

“’Cause you’re fucking ugly,”she says.